Skimm for February 14th

Quote of the Day: "I've been praying it would heal."  - Lady Gaga, describing why she had to cancel her tour for hip surgery

Things That Happened to Couples

Divorcing: Time Warner & Itself THE STORY: Time Warner is in discussions to divorce itself from Time Inc. and sell off the majority of its magazine division, allegedly to publisher Meredith Corp.

THE WHY (DO I NEED TO SKIMM?): Time Inc. is the nation's largest magazine publisher, with goodies like People, InStyle, Sports Illustrated, and, of course, Time. It's worth a pretty little penny at around $3 billion. It's still too early to tell what a Time Warner custody arrangement with Meredith would look like, but it would likely give Meredith an even bigger boost in the lady market. The company is doing what most do when contemplating divorce, weighing its tax options.

Separating: The Pope & the Church THE STORY: With Pope Benedict's last days as the big pontiff on the block coming to an end, the goodbyes are beginning.

THE WHY (DO I NEED TO SKIMM?) The pope's surprising resignation has left most of the Church in shock mode. He says he's frail; the Vatican spokesman clarified that he's not ill. Either way, he's got two weeks left and the Church is not going all out for a goodbye party. There will be no formal ceremony after his last day on the 27th and he'll turn in his scepter at the end of the work day. Meanwhile, the Church is struggling to find which color scheme he will best fit with: the white of a pope, the red of a cardinal, the black of a priest, the tan from his summer residence. He held his final public mass yesterday and did seem a bit verklempt.

Engaged: American Airlines & US AirwaysTHE STORY: The boards of American Airlines and US Airways have approved a merger that would create the world's largest airline. Someone must have liked it to put a ring on it.

THE WHY (DO I NEED TO SKIMM?): The deal offers American Airlines a way out of bankruptcy and makes the new patriotic giant worth around $11 billion. That's a lot of creepy airline blankets. The all-stock deal will leave American's bankruptcy creditors with 72% of the combined company, US Airways shareholders with the rest, and many passengers wondering what it means for them. Stay tuned.

REPEAT AFTER ME...What to say if you just bought a Mac... Motherfudger! Are you kidding me? Apple decided to cut its MacBook Pro laptop price by $200 and introduced a version with more memory, among some other price tweaking. Why now, you ask? Apple is revamping its top-end laptops and recently reported that things didn't go so well (at all) over the holidays. iPhone sales have been slipping too. Maybe it's just not Apple picking season or maybe iSaleTooLate?

What to say while watching "The Love Boat"... No, I'm not drowning my V-Day tears in nostalgic television, I'm trying to understand the terror of being stuck with the same cruise characters over and over again. A crippled cruise ship has been stuck in the Gulf of Mexico since Sunday when a fire broke its propulsion system (meaning the boat is a rockin'). Fights are reportedly breaking out because that's what happens when passengers are scared, hangry (think onion sandwiches) and have to use bags instead of restrooms. Supplies have since arrived and the ship is slated to dock later today. #FlyNextTime

What to say while watching "Law & Order"... If only their jurisdiction crossed oceans, boy would we have a case for them: the case of Prisoner X, a man found dead in an Israeli prison cell in 2010. X is now believed to be a 34-year-old Australian man, Ben Zygier, with connections to Mossad (Israeli spy agency -- don't mess). Israel recently confirmed that it imprisoned a mystery foreigner out of security considerations; his death was ruled a suicide but Israel didn't go into too much detail. Apparently the Australian embassy didn't know this detained mystery man was one of theirs until after his death. The secrecy surrounding X caused an outcry within Israel and abroad. International spy games are confusing.

What to say when your ex posts pics... Happy Valentine's Day to you. Pass the wine and chocolate to me. Now thanks to KillSwitch, my pain can be numbed and you can be erased. The mobile app makes it easy as 'DOWNLOAD NOW' to remove your ex's presence from your Timeline. Happy V-Day, indeed.

BIRTHDAYS: Bartolomeu Taub (New York, NY);  Katelyn deDiego (San Francisco, CA); Chesley Turner (Philadelphia, PA); Cristen Leister (New Smyrna Beach, FL); Don Kimbro (Montgomery, AL); Lynn Cartwright (Westchester, NY)

Congratulations! Welcome to theSkimm life.

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