QUOTE OF THE DAY

"If they do, then we just have to drink more beer" -- An Oktoberfest beer tent owner. German bakers are threatening to go on a pretzel strike over a pay dispute during this year's Oktoberfest. Luckily, the solution in a time like this is usually to drink more beer.

THINGS GIVING LEADERS A MIGRAINE

RUSSIA

THE STORY

Last week, Russia invaded Ukraine. Yesterday, NATO said that it's putting together a "high-readiness force" that could be sent to eastern Europe on short notice. Comforting.

WAIT, BACK UP.

When Ukraine said Russia was invading, Russian President Putin spat out his vodka and said he had 'no idea' what Ukraine was talking about. NATO and the US took a closer look and said 'we're pretty sure you do.'

WHERE ARE WE NOW?

This week, NATO's voting on officially creating this new force of thousands of troops that would be on high-alert and ready to ship out to eastern Europe. Meanwhile yesterday's peace talks between Ukraine, Russia, and the pro-Russian separatists causing havoc in Ukraine didn't go anywhere. Again.

theSKIMM

Well, this sounds a lot different than sanctions...


ISIS

THE STORY

ISIS: still a problem for the Mideast. But now the UK and Europe have made it clear that they see it as a big threat, too.

WHAT NOW?

Yesterday, German Chancellor Merkel said Germany would arm the Kurds -- a semi-independent ethnic group in northern Iraq – fighting ISIS militants. This is what you could call a big deal: Germany hasn't gotten involved like this in an ongoing conflict since WWII. Meanwhile, British PM Cameron said he wants to give UK authorities the go-ahead to seize passports of citizens suspected of fighting with extremist groups like ISIS. This comes after video was released last month of US journalist James Foley being beheaded by an ISIS militant speaking in a British accent.

theSKIMM

ISIS is a group that actively recruits abroad. It's clear that the international community is now seeing that this is very much not just an Iraqi and Syrian problem.

REPEAT AFTER ME...

WHAT TO SAY WHEN SOMEONE LOOKS AT YOUR TEXT MESSAGE ON THE SUBWAY…

Nope, not meant for you. Jennifer Lawrence and more than 100 other celebrities might be dealing with a bigger invasion of privacy. Nude photos allegedly of J. Law, Kate Upton, Kirsten Dunst, Ariana Grande and others were leaked over the weekend. Some of them have said the pics are fake. But Lawrence and Upton's reps confirmed they're legit and said this is a HUGE violation of privacy. The FBI's on it and Apple's investigating because it's wondering whether the creepers got ahold of these photos by hacking into iCloud. iDontWantYouToSeeMySelfies.

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU'RE SICK OF HEARING ABOUT ISIS…

Want to talk about another Islamic militant group instead? Yesterday, the US military conducted an operation against al-Shabaab, an al-Qaeda affiliated terrorist group in Somalia. If you're thinking you've heard that name before, it's because it's the same group that carried out last year's mall attack in Kenya that killed dozens of people. The US operation came one day after militants attacked government buildings in Somalia's capital. US officials didn't say why the operation happened, and said the Pentagon is still "assessing the results."

WHAT TO SAY WHILE WATCHING THE "SAVED BY THE BELL" LIFETIME MOVIE

Yes, something's different here. In another throwback change-up, we found out over the weekend that Stonehenge -- everyone's favorite gang of British rocks -- was actually once a full circle. Calm. Down. It turns out that the hose used to water the ground this summer couldn't reach around the whole 'Henge, eventually revealing a few dry patches where some stones and some archaeologists' pride once were.

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU DOODLE ON YOUR NOTEPAD DURING A MEETING...

Oh, look I just made a veil. Brad and Angie got married. Some kids drew on a veil.  And now we've got pics.

THING TO KNOW

NARP: Non-athletic regular person. Did you play tennis in high school, haven't picked up a racket since, and have a tendency to drop things? You're a NARP.


SKIMM FAVOR

Party's not over. Keep the weekend going at your desk by sharing theSkimm.

SKIMM BIRTHDAYS

Skimm'bassador Danna Galed (Queens, NY); Sandy Fiascone (Chicago, IL); Caroline Safran (New York, NY); Brittany Aprati (Chicago, IL); Rachel Zoe (Los Angeles, CA); Stinson Parks (New York, NY); Bel Murphy (London, England); Alexis Kulick (New York, NY); Wifredo Fernandez (Miami, FL); Elizabeth Dziedzic (Chicago, IL); Courtney Corace (Pittsburgh, PA); Claire Bechhold (New York, NY); Lauren King (Hoboken, NJ); Christina Fondren (Houston, TX); Ana Mostarac (Sydney, Australia); Rebecca Kijak (Seattle, WA);  Sarah Collins (Raleigh, NC); Alice Yen (San Francisco, CA); Anna Leieritz (Washington, DC); Michelle Moreno (Cottekill, NY); Ariann Bernstein (Philadelphia, PA); Jennifer Lynne Jenny (San Francisco, CA); Carey Olan (Potomac, MD); Cheyenne Schneider (Los Angeles, CA); Lauren Kelly Gall (New York, NY); Hallie Putterman (San Diego, CA); Kati Pajak (Newton, MA); Katy Kaesebier (Statesboro, GA); Libby Brittain (New York, NY); Tara Basu Trivedi (Atherton, CA); Ashley Brown (El Cerrito, CA); Benjamin Schreiber (Mendham, NJ); Saranya Vijayakumar (New York, NY); Steve Shaifer (Philadelphia, PA); Terri Banks Goeman (Birmingham, AL); Chris Cowan (Ferndale, WA); Chris Rooney (Cardiff by the Sea, CA); Chrissy Shifflett (Charlotte, NC); Christine Sang (New York, NY); Matthew Louisell (Grosse Point, MI); Alex Joseph (Milledgeville, GA); Alison Field (Chicago, IL); Kate Sanders (New Orleans, LA); Emily Karp (Scarsdale, NY); Terry Feagin (Houston, TX); Julian Reddick (Sydney, Australia)

Skimm'd something we missed?

Email SkimmThis@theSkimm.com

Please wait...

Congratulations! Welcome to theSkimm life.

Don't forget to share:

Share & Follow us