Skimm Money·

This Thanksgiving’s most annoying money topic

Happy Thanksgiving! What's your mortgage rate?

We’ve reached a new era of holiday small talk, at least in my neck of the woods (hello, Northern NJ!) Evidently, “What’s your mortgage rate?” is the new “What do you do for a living?” 

Thanksgiving table

It’s a make or break it moment: Who wants to participate in a rate-measuring contest? It's Thanksgiving, for crying out loud. That said, if you have a great rate, it's hard not to flex. My potentially controversial take? Let it be known — but don't stop there. If you do happen to be one of those lucky ducks who locked in a rock-bottom rate in the doldrums of the pandemic, share the whole picture of how you bought your place. Women, especially, are pros at using the holidays to compare strategies on everything from finding the best boots to tweaking our favorite viral soup recipes. So why not do that with finances?When/if you drop your mortgage rate into the conversation, tell the full story — the inheritance, the side hustle, the spreadsheets of doom. Because Thanksgiving is all about sharing what you’ve got, including credit score tips. 

Pairing pecan pie with portfolio advice,

Anna Davies, Money Writer

PS: We're building a resource to empower women with the data they need to make confident, informed decisions about homeownership. If you’ve bought a home, we’d love for you to share your experience — anonymously, of course — via this form.


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Turns out return-to-office policies can cost an employee more per month than an average domestic plane ticket. Which, sigh, means you can’t even escape on your days off. 

Q: I’m single and on a tight budget, while my married friend is pretty well off. Lately, it’s strained our friendship because when she invites me to hang out with her wealthy friends it’s always something expensive — fancy dinners, spa weekends — that she knows I can’t afford. It’s making me resent her financial situation. Can I do anything about it?

Just One Broke Girl

FEATURED EXPERT:

Money and friends can be weird, but of course you can do something about it. First, you need to decide if you still want to be friends. That might sound harsh, but it is OK if the friendship has run its course and you no longer have enough in common to sustain it. (Related: “I Can’t Afford My Friends. Now What?

But if you do want to stay friends, you need to talk to her about how you feel. It might be uncomfortable, but the best friendships aren’t just about the good times. Being vulnerable and overcoming rough patches can strengthen your bond. 

Don’t assume she knows how you feel — you have to speak up. Maybe she doesn’t understand just how tight your budget is. Or perhaps she doesn’t want you to feel left out, so she invites you anyway. (Related: “Help! My Friends Keep Inviting Me on Trips I Can’t Afford!”)

If having a heart-to-heart feels like more than you can handle, but you also don’t want to end your friendship, the third option is to take control of the planning. Make the first move in choosing the activities you do together and pick options you can afford. You also don’t have to hang out with your friend’s rich friends. Some friendships are more successful if they are just one-on-one relationships.

friends at a picnic

Tell Us

How much should the friend with the bigger budget accommodate  the lower-budget friend’s financial situation?

Submit your money or work question for our panel of experts. Don't worry, it's anonymous.

Use the letters below to identify the word or phrase, then click to reveal the answer.

Clue: Strategically selling underperforming investments to offset your stock market gains and shrink your tax bill. This strategy is a December favorite for investors and accountants.

​​ ​TOGETHER WITH NEW YORK LIFE

We know how easy it can be for admin activities to fall to the bottom of your to-do list. Seriously. One of our editors has been meaning to get an employer-independent life insurance policy since her son was born…three and a half years ago. Now, she’s finally taken the first step: a call with a New York Life financial professional. Head here to see how it went — and how you can schedule and prepare for your own (free) introductory call.

A Calculator to Plot Your Financial Future

What it is: Money Tools Passive Income Calculator

screenshot of calculator

Heard the phrase, “Make your money work for you?” That’s what passive income is. Unlike money you earn in exchange for work, passive income is money your existing assets earn for you, like interest, rental income, and dividends. If you make the right moves now, you can ultimately live off of passive income. This calculator gives you a roadmap.

Key features:

  • Super simple. Just plug in your salary, savings, age, and the age you want to start living off passive income. It’ll show you how much you can expect to make each month.

  • Adjusts for inflation. With inflation adjustments, you’ll see what your future money will actually feel like in today’s dollars — so you’ll have a clear picture of your spending power.

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