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The latest in parenting news, tips, and trends:
The new Pump Act is in effect. Here's how it's protecting an additional 9 million lactating parents.
What postpartum depression can look like in men, and why it’s so underreported even though 1 in 10 men experience it.
How some parents are hiring "baby name consultants" to ensure they have a unique baby name. Hmm…
The ways you can support a loved one going through infertility. Plus, why it’s so challenging for military families to get infertility care.
Why experts are saying you shouldn’t rely only on floaties and water wings when it comes to water safety. Parents are the first line of defense.
tell me what to do
Q: How do I handle toddler biting?
It’s easy to feel embarrassed or confused when your kiddo starts biting others out of nowhere, but it’s important to remember that this behavior is not a reflection of your parenting. Biting can be a normal stage in a child’s development, says Dr. Smita Malhotra, chief medical director for the Los Angeles Unified School District. Your goal is to guide your kid through this stage.
Here’s how:
Figure out why: Toddlers have big emotions, and since they can’t use words, they express themselves through behavior. Children who are stressed are more likely to bite others, says Dr. Malhotra. If your kid is biting at daycare, partner with the staff to find the cause. Toddlers can be overwhelmed when they are crowded by other kids, or there could be other triggers, like if they’re tired, bored, or hungry.
Be firm, calm, and kind: This can be especially hard when you’re the one on the receiving end. Let your kid know that biting hurts, says Dr. Malhotra. Instead of shaming them, tell them it’s not okay and that you will help them find another way to feel better.
Redirect the behavior: If your toddler is teething and biting others, try giving them a teething ring or toy. Eventually, they will learn to bite the toys to get relief. You can also try to redirect the behavior by teaching them to use their words (like "no" or "stop") instead of biting.
Stick to routines: This applies to bedtime and mealtimes. Routines are anchors of stability for children. When they are disrupted, children can often show frustration through behavior, says Dr. Malhotra.
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self-help
Dealing With Difficult Parents Turned Grandparents
Just because you don’t have an awesome relationship with your parents doesn’t mean it has to be that way for your kids. You call the shots for your family’s health and well-being, so it all comes down to setting *drum roll please* boundaries, says Olivia Verhulst, a psychotherapist and an adjunct psychology professor at NYU.
How you can get started:
Identify where the conflict is coming from: Where are you feeling the most tension or conflict in your relationship? Ask yourself what doesn’t feel right or align with your belief systems for your family. Boundaries could focus on the type of talk used around your kid, screen time, or mental health needs. Or you could set parameters around how and when grandparents and your kids communicate (like FaceTime calls) so it can focus on their relationship and not yours.
Schedule a time to talk to your parents: Be direct, intentional, and respectful when stating your boundaries. It could help to frame them as having to do with your needs and beliefs, as opposed to being centered around the other person’s faults. Here are some scripts you can use.
Stay firm and consistent: Creating limits with others can provide the space for the most enjoyable interactions to take place. “Boundaries are what help relationships to foster closeness, not push people away. You may consider sharing this point with your parents too if they can hear it,” says Verhulst.
Check in with yourself: Striking that balance between allowing yourself to feel healthy anger and not allowing it to disrupt your quality of life (or of others) is hard. Give yourself validation and compassion, take breaks when needed, and come back to the purpose of why you’re allowing this relationship to exist. Make sure you have a safe space or support system to help you through the process.
research says
A More Nurturing Approach Helps Newborns Dealing With Opioid Withdrawal
New research shows that babies born to opioid users had shorter hospital stays and less need for medication when their care prioritized breastfeeding and skin-to-skin contact with their parents.
Babies born to opioid users can develop withdrawal symptoms, and in many cases, they’re taken to the NICU (and separated from their moms) to be evaluated and treated with medication. In this study, researchers looked at a newer approach called Eat, Sleep, Console, which focuses less on medication and more on swaddling and having a low-stimulation room (dark and quiet). The goal is to empower families to care for their newborns.
Researchers looked at 1,300 newborns at 26 hospitals across the country in areas that were geographically diverse and included both academic centers and community hospitals. Babies in the Eat, Sleep, Console group had an average hospital stay of 7.8 days, and only 19.5% of them received medication. Compared to babies in the usual-care group, where the average stay was 14 days and 52% received opioid treatment.
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